I am currently doing a unit at Sanata Dharma called Penahami Lintas Budaya (or Cross-Cultural Relations). We've been given an assignment to come up with common stereotypes about:
- Indonesia
- Australia
- America
- Europe
- Asia
- Africa
- etc.
It's really quite confronting since we have always been told from a young age not to stereotype people. Trying to think about Australian stereotypes of Indonesian's is next to impossible for me after living here and I know we will be asked specifically about them (and unfortunately most stereotypes about Indonesia in Australia are negative). In my research I came across these stereotypes about all different European countries and found them quite amusing. Whether they're true or not is another matter but insightful all the same.
The British:
- will say sorry to a lamp post if they walk into it, and probably mean it too
- have a tendency to get unflatteringly nationalist and arrogant (though only at major sporting events)
- tend to over-estimate their importance in the world, forgetting that they are more or less the lapdogs of America nowadays
- all know the Queen and Princess Di personally
- absolutely hate the French
- drink warm beer and have the worst national cuisine in the world
- make beautiful, ingeniously designed cars and motorcycles but have no idea of the concept of reliability
- live in thatched cottages in small villages, next to a castle
- are bald, have bad teeth, are pale, uptight, reserved in the extreme and, if male, are probably gay (because they all go to residential schools, talk like Hugh Grant and get buggered by older kids and teachers)
- are utterly dependable in a war
The Irish:
- are always, always drunk
- (if living abroad) will do anything for Ireland, absolutely anything, except actually live there
- fight a lot
- shag sheep
The Scots:
- are the same as the Irish but also spectacularly tight-fisted with money
- hate the English
- wear kilts (with nothing underneath, of course)
- have red hair and freckles
- say "och aye the noo!" all the time
- eat haggis
The Welsh:
- shag sheep
- sing in all-male choirs
- say "boyo" constantly
- shag sheep
- sort of hate the English
- are obsessed with rugby
- shag sheep
The French:
- hate the English (but like the Scots)
- smoke
- are, in positions of authority, officious and rude
- hate it when people speak don't speak French when visiting
- hate it when people try to speak French when visiting
- think that France is the best country in the world and everyone else's country is vastly inferior
- treat women like shit
- drive like idiots
- have really, really good food
- are all communists (especially if they're students)
- show their breasts in films all the time, for no particular reason
- are really crap at fighting in wars
- colluded with the Nazis almost immediately after they got conquered
- say "mon dieu" "sacre bleu!" and "ooh la la!" regularly
- never wash themselves
The Belgians:
- have nothing of interest other than chocolate and beer
- can't decide if they're French or Dutch, so have settled for both
The Dutch:
- are all stoned
- are the most laid back people in Europe
- live in houses that are 8 stories high and 3 feet wide, in a country flatter than Kate Moss's chest
- spell their words in one way and pronounce them in a completely different way, according to a set of rules that you can never know unless you are Dutch
- speak English better than the English
- grow tulips and wear clogs
- have the most liberal laws on the planet
The Germans:
- are obsessed with all the filthiest, most perverse sexual practices they can dream up
- think they are the best people in Europe
- are really sorry about the Nazi thing
- have taken the term "precision engineering" and turned it into an art form that is always worth the inevitably high price
- drink a lot of beer, but are never actually drunk like the Scots and Irish
- don't shave their armpits (if female)
- have mullets and moustaches (if male)
- are genetically incapable of having a sense of humor
- eat sausages and sauerkraut
The Austrians
- really liked the Nazis
- are not German (even though they are)
- still like the Nazis
The Swiss:
- like chocolate
- saw the phrase "rules and regulations" and elevated it to an art form
- have lots of snow
- yodel
- stole the Jews' gold
The Italians:
- wear aftershave by the gallon
- drive tiny, zippy little cars and scooters without any reference to sensible driving practices
- are passionate in the extreme, about everything
- are gorgeous (if female)
- are creepy and obsessed with picking up chicks (if male)
- say "mama mia" all the time
- change their government about as often as they change their underwear
- gesticulate wildly at every opportunity
- have the most politically corrput society in Europe
- have great food (though not as great as the French)
- are obssessed with football
The Swedes:
- drive Volvos
- think sex should be practised as often as possible, but only in a light-hearted, unserious way
- are all communists
- are not Norwegian (even thought there's no difference between them)
- are all called something-somethingsson
- commit suicide more than any other nation
- are all blonde (yes, all of them)
The Norwegians:
- eat fish and only fish
- are amazingly religious in the classic "hard-working Protestant" sense
- are not Swedes (even though there's no difference between them)
- have fjords
The Icelanders:
- all know each other personally
- are not Scandinavian
- all indulge in bizarre, dangerous sports
In Heaven,
The police are British,
The cooks are French,
The engineers are German
The administrators are Swiss
And the lovers Italian.
In Hell,
The police are German
The cooks are British
The engineers are Italian
The administrators are French
And the lovers Swiss."
